Talk to my hand

Moody

It was 3 Pm, Marie was at work and texted I love you, John.

The message was delivered and so she was staring at the screen for John to read the message and reply her back in his romantic tone of message and smileys. It was 2 minute that Marie was running out of patience and decided to call him. But, she remembered her last call to John ended up with disappointment. Marie called John frequently to talk about her day, making plans, her experiment which she does in the lab. John seemed uninterested in her topics. She also tried being romantic but it was of no use to bring the John behave like happy old days. She just didn’t know the reason behind his strange behavior. So she kept the phone down back in the drawer. Nothing can stop her from messaging her to John when she misses him so much, and this was that time. Rather than listening to his harsh tone and in hesitation. She started typing that there’s a new restaurant in downtown and they should definitely try it in evening. She pressed send option. Then again she remembered that John did not like paying bills. So she also texted him that she would be paying the bills.

It wasn’t like John was the unsuccessful person, he was one of the best business analysts. It was months John had taken Marie out for a date and Marie thought this would be the reason because he said it her once that he don’t like paying bills so cannot go out for dinner.

What kind of a boyfriend does that?

She was nervous and happy to go out with him. She was waiting eagerly at the bus stop for him. When she saw him coming. Smiling.

Ah, everything’s fine

That evening, no matter how hard Marie tried being romantic, John just dropped the topic. Eventually, Marie didn’t want to spoil the evening and so went along with his side of talks. He didn’t even wait to spend time with her. Just left.

Marie saw him going. Sadly.

Weeks passed by, Marie didn’t receive any messages from him. So it was clear like pure rain water or mirror that could reflect light or black surface that could absorb whole heat that John has lost interest in her.

She just didn’t know what to do, how to bring him back!

All efforts to ignore his behavior or getting along with his loss of interest thing and forgetting about him were in vain.

She just loved him so much!

One night when Marie was watching TV with her family with John dominating her mind, her phone blinked as a message is received. She checked it and a wide smile spread on her face. It was John. They talked about movies, music, work and etc for hours through messages.

Then, Marie send him a text asking what his problem was!

It was almost an hour in the argument that John denied telling her anything. That was when she quit! Stopped asking him and thought to behave as their breakup never minded her. She was enjoying her life more than she was with John.

Some weeks later:

Marie started hearing rumors about a girl who John was dating. This was a sudden shock right to her nerves, but she pretended to be as cool as ice on her head would be. Something was cracking and shouting inside her that still, she is struggling her feelings for John, he has set out with another girl so soon like she mattered nothing to him from the start and all his romance was fake, on the outside, she was smooth as a music.

She prayed for all the rumors to be fake. To her horror, one day she finds out she was absolutely wrong.

Then she realized that John was actually in love with this another girl and this was the reason he denied telling her why he was a changed man to Marie. Why he cannot be a normal boyfriend and love her like she wanted him to do. All her trust in love and magnificent hope for getting back in life as she was before vanished. The person whom she loved most, did everything for his happiness never ever bothered about her feelings.

All she could think about was I can never be in love with someone. But, I’ll never spare this man for hurting me, for not taking care of me, leaving me to rot in my mourning period.

—-xxx—-

Marie had become a successful researcher. It was cold evening when she was walking back home from work and on her way she saw couples holding hands, hugging under a shade of the tree where no one can see them. Now she found it very creepy. She can never think about this ever, also she hated her old self when she gave more importance to others than herself which was the main reason for her low confidence.

Later that evening she posted a photo on Instagram with her colleagues having waffles at a famous snacks store just opened in her city. John was one of her followers to like it. Well, she was obviously not following him back.

Her mobile blinked a text as she was going to bed. It was John.

You look beautiful in the photo. The number was not saved in her phone, but she could see his display photo and figured out it was him.

The very nice thing that she did was to delete that freak’s message and went to sleep calmly.

Moral: The only thing that Marie wanted was to be kind and not to lose her anger and friendship to John, she thought it might be easy to stay friends. But, the more she stayed in his environment the more she was disappointed. Maybe Marie was too weak and emotional to move on and when you are too weak, just let the person go on his way and stop being kind to them. Behave the way they did to you. Make them realize that they are also unimportant for you as you are to them. In short, being kind is not an option for all situation, there has to be some roughness in you to handle such circumstances.

My-my-mystical

Mystical

Living right
Even not with you
Totally bright
Away from your dark flu
And I say, go with the sail
Like it floats on a water up-down
To reach its route
I am just my-my-mystical
I feel so electrical
By the way, I am going
It feels so great…..!!!

I must have cried
I thought I died
From within, a lot of times
Only for you.
Only for you.

But then, I found
I am my-my-mystical
I feel so electrical
This is my reflection
The way we’ll be in connection
So go on, hate me
After all, I am more……….
My-my-mystical
Also, electrical
Way more, mystical.

It’s my turn to break the fence

Fence

Excuse me, now you can have your vulnerable life to yourself
Make sure, nobody gives a damn to your love and care
It’s you dragging people into your consciousness
The way you mold and make a drama out of people’s soul
Your sympathy and attention are just a term for fraud
Count your blessings which you literally snatch away
Since you know how to betray
Accept the truth that lies behind the mask you wear
Classify people and pampering you give to seek new friends
Yes, you were my bestie one time
I want you to know that you’ll always be
Because you keep returning to the past
And, behold me as before
As you have kept a grudge on me
This is how I won your own game
Played with your made rules
I have left you hanging on to your match
Now all you will be thinking that how I am so cool!

Our unconscious mind-blank

Blank

It’s clear

I struggled it through

It left me feeling so empty

I don’t know

What’s it about?

I still  have to figure things out

We all must have experienced the time when we must have fallen in love. The time when we had lost ourselves to love them infinitely. Thinking of them in our dreams or after we wake up. Yes, I am talking about our special ones. We call them as ‘Special ones’ because they make us feel special, obviously as the word indicates. There is no one like them in our life who could love us like they do. And, also you must be remembering the day when you had a broken up with your special one. Yes, it must have taking you long time to overcome them. Some people just take forever for that. But, what we don’t realize is what made that person special was actually us !  We love someone more than ourselves, we care for them day and day out. Made them feel special too in a way they did to us like no one had ever made them feel or could not make them feel like you did, since we all have our own aura. So this eventually means that the power was inside us. We carry so much power of love, that we needed someone to share with. And, when they go away, we feel empty because they had taken some of our special power away. Don’t mourn over the loss. See this as opportunity to get recharged again. Recharge yourself with a more developed power which would be stronger than the before one. Some take this as not getting in a relationship again, not getting closer to someone again, some take it as getting rude over people or some just start loving again. Choice is yours, just remember to make sure that it develops you in all the way of your life and you are happy. At the end of the story, being happy is all that matters.

Be happy 🙂

 

 

We are stronger than we know

Clear your heart
Clear your mind
Slow it down from throbbing fast
Prevent yourself
From cutting the veins with knife
You’ll get to know
How strong you actually are !
You just have to Clear the past
And, leave behind
There will be a day
When you will realize
It wasn’t worth it
It wasn’t worth a decision
To make for your life.

Being a swag- A phase

Phase

There are ‘n’ number of books which actually tell us to be grateful everyday, to count out blessings, how to actually change ourselves, tips to heal from a bad past and so on and so forth. We read such kinds of books just because we are hurt by our loved ones or they leave us alone. The most important of all is we jot things down on a book so that we follow them dutifully with a lot of dedication. The minute we see our betrayer, we just freak out and forget all the rules and regulations that we just made to overcome them. Because there is a part in us which keeps on screaming inside us to be nice and humble no matter what it takes. That’s where we become weak and we give in, fail to ignore them. This is the main problem with ‘good people’. Yes, good people. I am not trying to discriminate between anyone or pointing others as bad ones. But, some people just move on like they don’t care. This is because they didn’t loved their betrayer to the deepest, which helps them to change spontaneously. But, people like me who just keep being polite no matter what others tell me on my face or back bitches to me find hard to move on.

Yes, this is from my personal experience. I am very friendly, but it’s not like I cry over loss of each and every friend in my life. I just get close to some of them and most obvious thing which we all do, we expect, I also expect from them. Which is actually a basic human nature. What we get is they take us for granted, which is actually a basic human nature again.

So the main point of this article is expect or take people granted, get hurt or hurt others. whatsoever things cannot be controlled. But, we can control ourselves and the way we respond to them. Which can be done by being cool and swag !!! We need to change our perspective. This can be done by being swag, seriously and this is gonna work. From the beginning, if we are good in a relationship and on the other side we care more for ourselves and be a spoiler too. It’s like keeping ourselves prepared for the future. It may indirectly mean to become selfish, and that’s the point I am trying to clear ‘Love to be selfish’. Then, no matter how bad  the relationship ends and you both get too emotional, you will remember being a spoiler. It’s like not giving a heck about anything, just because you were prepared for it. This is a lot more easier than reading many books of getting healed and finding ourselves.

swaggirlsquotestumblrtumblr-comswaggirlquote

How many times are you gonna find yourselves for many of the heart breaks that has happened or will happen in the future? If we get a little bit of spoiler and selfish, then at least we will not get hurt mentally. Being a swag is like not giving a heck to the people who mentally strain us intentionally, provided that we understand it. Call yourselves confidently, that I am a vicious woman or names that we woman got from our society. To scare people away and not to hurt us in any way. Because, we know what we want and let’s swag together 😀